The big 3-0
I just turned thirty. I thought this day would never come. Not because I dreaded it. Quite the opposite, I’ve felt like I was in my 30s for a long time. Thirty isn’t scary but rather it’s a moment when you get to settle into the adult you’ve been trying to be through your twenties but haven’t been taken seriously. Though I’m lucky. I exist in a multitude of communities where I get to play different roles: I teach (somewhat serious I’d say), I’m a drag queen (quite the opposite), I work in theatre in a number of capacities and I socialize with a lot of people who are completely outside of any of those worlds. And that affords me a certain freedom to be a lot of people in a lot of circumstances. And to vascillate between those different roles.
Thirty is about letting those different roles exist together.
I recently came across my old five year plans (yup, I used to make ‘em) and was astounded to discover that I’ve actually achieved all the things I had hoped for, so it makes me wonder what my next move is? I’m deeply grateful to be doing what I do and want to continue doing so and building and growing and writing better plays and producing better events. Though I never, never, never want Peach Cobblah to look better – I like her odd “Ronald McDonald’s prison wife” aesthetic. But the next five years I want to fill with doing things that maybe I’m not so good at.
Two years ago I started playing soccer in a local gay soccer league, mostly because I wanted to try something that I didn’t think I’d be good at. And I was fairly right. I’m not completely incompotent, but I’m by no means a good player. And that’s a good thing. It’s good for the old ego to do things that we’re not dynamite at. It keeps us human.
One of those things is becoming a parent. People often say to Cameron and I that we would be amazing parents. And that might be the case, but who knows, I might be really terrible at it. I don’t know how to properly hold a baby, I’ve never changed a diaper, but damnit, the next five years will find us as fathers and we will take it from there. What am I ultimately saying? That being a dad is the new gay soccer? Maybe. You’ll just have to stay tuned and see.
So for the time being, here are some hilarious things that will find their way into my next five year plan:
-Lose some weight, then put it back on and realize I don’t care all that much
-See my play Tiny Replicas finally become a feature film (yup, that’s happening in 2014)
-Start my new big gay dance party called The Gay Agenda
-Try playing a new position in soccer
-Realize that new positions do not, in fact, make me a better soccer player.
-Realize I also don’t care that I’m not a good soccer player as long as there’s booze at the field. Unless you’re a cop or parks board member in which case there isn’t booze at the field ever, I promise.
-Travel more within North America – not every trip needs to be huge.
-Finally shoot Peach Cobblah’s music video
-Capitalize on the fact that I have dental – maybe get a grill.
-Write those plays that I’ve been talking about writing for years but have never finished. Even if they’re bad. Just get ‘em done.
-Make a baby. Which involves finding a womb. But making it no matter the challenges and being a dad and letting all the other things I do fall apart if they need to in order to make it happen.
Happy 2014 – let’s go big.